Some people just can't handle the jealousy

I just can't bottle this in anymore. When raw emotion grips you like a mother cat grips the back of her baby kitty's neck and carries you to the edge of sanity and throws you over into the boiling saucepan of never-ending boilingness, you have no other choice but to cry out to the humans of planet earth for just a little piece of understanding!! I am there. I have felt the whispering winds of whiperiness. I have opened the sauerkraut bottle of magnanimous magnanimity. I... ok I can hear you asking me to shut up and get to the point. So here it is:

Telepathy is not a joke, people! I just think that we could all be more thoughtful toward people who, by no action of their own, were born with that burdensome burden of burdenitude. I know that many of you think that the ability to communicate with your mind, and to read other people's minds would be a big tease. You think that you could have a lot of fun, well think again! Imagine the following true story:

Once upon a time there was a man named shibblesnork. All of his friends called him 'old shibsy' because that was easier to say back then when things were different than now.

Shibsy was minding the goat churner one morning when a strange fellow from the east wandered past the front gate. Since he was telepathic, without trying he caught this thought fluttering out of the stranger's brain: "Gee golly hey, I'm going to rob me up a bank today! Whoop diddly doo dum did!!" Now, you might not know this, but telepathic people can ask non-telepathic people questions, and the non-telepathic people will answer those questions just by thinking them, never knowing that they had been asked by someone else. So Shibsy telepathically asked "Which bank done you did think up robbing?" To which the stranger thought "Hadn't reckoned up what bank to caboozle. Maybe that big red one down in the town there." "That sounds great! Go for that one, you big sack of moldy old soap bubbles!" replied Shibsy. Shibsy was relieved, for it was the bank that he did not bank at, and thus, was no worry of his. However, this whole time he forgot to keep winding the churn winder, so his dinner was spoilt.

My great grand-friend used to read that story to me at night. Every night. Holy cow I got tired of that stupid story! But it taught me something! Just because someone can do something cool, that doesn't mean that they are automatically cool.

I would like to close with this final thought that my mother always taught me: Only reach for the stars if you want to burn your hands. They are balls of burning gas, stupid!